From Sea World to deep insights..(possible ocean metaphor? eh not likely)

This is the longest I've gone without writing. (I think.)

Forgive me but I just got back from Sea World

A place that I haven't been to in years. 

It may sound sentimental but it was like coming home. 

Okay not completely. I'm not Aunt Aubrey.

I love the ocean and the creatures that claim it as their home. 

Dolphins, seals, sea lions, whales, turtles, clown fish 

and orcas and sharks.

Those are my 2 favorite. To the point where I bought a shark tooth necklace and a whale tail necklace while we were at the park.

Here's the Dolphin show that we watched today. 

 I've never been as passionate about the ocean, not outwardly at least. Aunt Aubrey? She wants to become a dolphin trainer and work at Sea World. 

I take that back. I am as passionate, I just don't show it. 

I don't like that I don't show it. 

Girls, you may not like reading this but I'll say it anyways: 

There are a lot of things about me that I don't like. 

Things you may go through (if you're not going through them now). 

I don't like that I don't show emotions, I don't show if I'm passionate. 

It takes a lot to get me to show things. I have to really be angry, really be happy, really be sad, really be excited. 

Otherwise I just show calmness, a laid-back California beach vibe. 

At least that's what I call it. I did live in California, you know haha.

Listen to the song at the end of that video (start about 18:50). I hear that song and songs similar to that and it pushes me, pushes something inside of me to do something, be something, create something and yet...nothing.

It wasn't enough.

Not enough to break through.

Not enough to motivate me.

Maybe I really don't have enough drive. 

Not enough to get past big hurdles..

Guess I've got more to work on then.