I went to Grandpa today to ask for a father's blessing. It's nice having him on campus and so close to where I live now. Girls, that truly is a blessing in and of itself.
Part of why I asked him is that I am just not that nice of a person. Sure I'm "nice" but I'm not that nice. I don't have much charity for people I don't want to be friends with and I've never prayed to have an increase of charity.
I don't want that anymore. I want people to feel that I'm pleasant to be around, that I care about them even if we're not good/great/best friends. I'm talking about the kind of person that is good. Just all around good. Good and kind, with minimal to no judging of others (ha good luck with that!), who's always reaching a hand out to others if they need one.
That, my dear little ones, that is part of who I want to become. That is one aspect of the person I want to be. And I'm nowhere near that yet. Dear me, I'm far, far away from that.
I believe that everyone has a mirror, a personal mirror. This is the mirror that shows all of oneself (here comes the awkward third-person/2nd person/occasionally me point of view), the good, the bad, the ugly, the fabulous. Yes, this mirror-like so many other mirrors-can get dirty, can get dusty, can get broken.
Well right now my mirror is tarnished, chipped, cracked and very very dusty. There might also be a mud stain from the last time I played outside. Sometimes I can't see my reflection clearly and I get obscure and retched versions of myself.
So that's what I'm trying to work on. Who knew cleaning a mirror would be so hard? I'm reading up charity, I'm trying to find pieces to replace the cracked ones and it's going to take time. A lot of time. But apparently patience is what I'm also supposed to learn so....joy. We'll chat more about this at a later date.
I was going to say "here goes nothing" but it didn't fit with the previous sentence. I give up. Goodnight.
No comments:
Post a Comment